Cycle Specifics, Genesis Consult and Insurance Challenges

After our consult we agreed to a series of appointments to check our hormones, general health, sperm quality, uterus and more. It started with blood work (a lot of blood work), a "Schlosser" sample from my husband, and a Physical Exam/Gyn Ultrasound for me. Then there were "cycle specific" tests that had to be scheduled around my specific cycle. Once that started it led to a son-hysterogram, more blood work, and finally a Hysteroscopy. That was a fun week. All the tests were split on different days. Sometimes we went to Red Rock Fertility twice in the same day. I was so greatful to have a boss that was understanding and flexible with my schedule at work. Luckily my husband had the same flexibility so I didn't have to do anything alone. A great rock that Mr Schlosser... As of now, all the tests are done, and they have the results. We have a follow up consult later this month review everything, pay in full (welp... ) and start the actual process.

That same day, in between two other appointments, we had our over the phone consult with Genesis.
Since they were sent all of the information on September 8th, I assumed the 4-6 week expectation of the probe completion started then. It did not. Genesis would not begin any part of your process until they are paid in full. We actually had to pay them to even get this over the phone consult scheduled. $4000.00 and three weeks later, we got our consult. They explained that they would need cheek swabs from us for DNA, and requested to use a sample from Liam for DNA. I understand this sounds morbid and awful. These are the things they just sort of throw at you in situations like this. What are you going to do..? Refuse? Cry? Get even more frustrated? For what....? So... After the blow of hearing that request out loud, we consented. This would give them the best picture of the exact breakdown of the disorder and would give them every best chance of screening for it using the probe. It was essential. In a way we were lucky to even have any type of anything left from Liam. Not everyone even has that option. We were grateful. Also knowing Liam had a part in helping us with his future siblings gave me a bit of comfort in a way. By the following week, they had the DNA they needed from everyone, they were paid, and were officially starting the process. It would take an estimated 4-6 weeks for the probe to be complete. I hope its done by our follow up appointment, and we can start the process as soon as possible.

After our consult with Red Rock Fertility, I began the process to have IVF approved through my insurance. My employer is great. My insurance is great. The fact that the wording is so specific enough in our actual contract is cruel. They denied our request. Even though my policy specifically says

"Criteria for coverage of embryo genetic testing prior to implantation: Either donor has an inherited disease or is a documented carrier of a genetically-linked inheritable disease"

they still denied us. We literally had documentation of both of us being carriers and effected children. Even if they would have approved that part, there was still the 20k they would not. We appealed. I wrote a letter explaining everything, had it proofread, included letters of recommendation from my OB and two genetic counselors, and included all of the documentation proving our condition. The medical staff that helped are highly accredited in Nevada. I felt SO hopeful for this. But, It too, was denied. After our family pleaded to help us, we opened a GoFundMe account to help with costs. If it wasn't for the love and support of our family and friends, I truly do not know what we would do. (You know who you are & Thank you). 

 Hopefully all goes well on our next appointment. I'm already getting so anxious about starting everything. I'm so excited to begin, and possibly be that much closer to having another child. I'm also getting really nervous from all of the horror stories that I've heard of others enduring during this process. The injections, medications, side effects, etc - Ugh... I used to think that IVF was an "easy" alternative - just expensive - for those who were battling infertility. I had no idea what these women were expected to go through. I had no idea the emotional toll, success rates, demanding scheduling and the actual physical pain involved. I never really gave it much thought at all until it applied to us. If I've learned anything in the last year, its not to judge people... No matter how "easy" it seems things came to them, or how "happy" them make their life appear - There's always more to it. Its not really anyone else's business anyways. The perfect seeming couple with two adorable perfect children that I seem to ALWAYS notice at the grocery store - Theres no telling what they went through for their family. How their relationship really is. Why waste time on feeling bitter when I don't even know their story or struggle. Maybe there isn't one and they are just lucky and perfect, and if thats the case, good for them too! We could all be so lucky. I'm finding so much peace in letting things go. Especially the things I create in my own assumptions that I let bother me. I have too much good in my life to worry about anyone else. I want to stay in my own little bubble with my close family and friends. They make me happy. They are what I care about. I hope this process is KIND to me. In the meantime, I'm going to try and have sane person thoughts and not let my self get overwhelmed with the constant urge to reproduce and nurture.